Black Coffee and Grey Stories

The lights indoor flickered while the lightning outside proudly performed her one-woman show for the city dwellers. Music was playing in the background at a volume that is perfect for a conversation. The apartment felt bright and happy with small trinkets and pillows, which was Meher’s idea of decor. While Diya added the necessities like couch, desk, chair and extension cords to light up the colorful lamps. It was one of those fall evenings when all you wanted to do was NOTHING. And then one of them spoke.

“Are you quoting F.R.I.E.N.D.S again?” Diya rolled her eyes in a way only Diya could and continued her angry rant. “I swear to God, you are going to lose all your ‘real’ life friends if you don’t stop, this very moment.”

“But it is the best. I cannot help it. Ok, let me explain so it is easier to understand.” Meher was her usual chirpy self, even tonight.

“No! No way I am spending my very precious and boring evening listening to you explain for the millionth time how great that show is. I don’t want to hear it.” Diya dug her fingertips so deep into her ears and started singing out loud. “If I die young bury me in satin. Lay me down on a bed of roses”. And at this moment you should be made aware that Diya is a professional singer. A damn good one.  

And even though it was too hard to ignore Diya’s mesmerising voice, Meher still powered through and continued talking, “Yesterday, you asked how my day was going? And I said UNAGI. That was because I wanted to have sushi for dinner. Simply meaning that I was having a bad day and needed sushi to cheer me up. Well, it is not my fault you thought we were scheduled for a Women’s self-defense class.”

“It is not until next Saturday.” Meher tried rolling her eyes but failed miserably. Also, because while she was trying to roll her very big brown eyes a pillow hit her in the face, really hard.

“Arrgghghhh! I am honestly going to kill you with my bare hands, you sushi lover. Quiet now!” The pillow hitting Meher right in the face was not satisfying enough. Diya now put two on her own head trying to quiet down Meher’s blabbering.

“But I am not done yet.” Meher politely snatched the pillows from Diya’s very strong grip one by one forcing her to pay attention.

“Listen…”

“Noooooo…why do I have to? Why are you doing this to me? I thought you were my best friend. I can’t even go out of this apartment. DAMN YOU Covid-19.” Diya was now screaming even louder.

But there was nothing stopping Meher tonight. It was like she had been shot with extra doses of FRIENDS just so she could annoy Diya more. And so she continued, “Then in the morning my mom called and asked about Dan. And that is exactly the moment you gave me the shocked look, like ‘doesn’t she know that you broke up with him a month ago’. And that is when I said, ‘they don’t know that we know they know we know’ ah ha… smooth, right? How I used the perfect quote to explain the confusion to you. By the way Mom still thinks I am dating Dan, so there will not be any of those annoying conversations about, love, life and loneliness. I mean, come on, I have you. My best Friend”. Her fingers happily made air quotes for the word ‘Friends’ and scarily slipped down looking at the very large green eyes of her friend Diya.

“Shut up Meher or I will kill you!”

“You know what, go ahead. I am not scared of you. And you know why, because ‘I am FINE’. The air quotes for the word FINE were not a smart thing to do. Because she was now pinned down by the very strong Yogi, who was quite enjoying herself sitting on the very FINE person’s head.

After a few moments of silence, Diya decided to let go of her very cute and chirpy FRIEND. It took Meher a couple of seconds to catch her breath. She then very lovingly stared at her splendidly perfect FRIEND, and asked, “Does this mean we are on a break?”

And then there was a sound of something crashing. A brightly colored ceramic cup just missed Meher’s very beautiful messy bun and hit the wall behind her.

She cheekily smiled at Diya trying to sing shamelessly, “Ha, I made you miiiisss…”

There was another sound right at this moment. A smacking sound of facepalm!